“Yes sir”, answered the in-keeper, winking in a knowing way at the fox and the cat, as if to say “I understand”.

Carlo Collodi, Pinocchio

Knowing is not just a word but a concept that is so virile and critical to shaping the wellness & happiness of families & relationships. Knowing is a complete word in itself and to know means to possess a thorough savviness about everything that keeps you integral & free from vulnerability. To know is to be free. Knowing is crucial! There is a lovely cycle within the inter-subjective experience between a parent & child that begins when the emotional expression of an event by one member of the dyad is met by the other with the attitude of CAKE. When the emotional expression is met with that attitude, the experience of both knowing and being known is unique and rich. The original emotional expression and its reception by the other is now transformed into a joint emotional experience of deep engagement that in turn may be transforming to each. Both become absorbed by the experience. Each now knows the other in a more profound manner while each is equally known by the other. Both are absorbed in their shared, living moment.

To love a child can be the most beautiful thing in the world and sometimes the most painful thing. When you love your child sincerely you do whatever it takes to make them happy. When you truly love your child the most important thing is their happiness. Let them know that you will always be there for them, no matter what. If they’re having problems or are upset, show them that you care. If you always remain sincere, he or she may gradually realise how valuable you are and will begin to learn to love you back. There is a chance that he or she does actually love you, but never assume. Just continue to care.

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